Friday, March 19, 2010

The Stubborn Side

This won't come as a surprise to most of you, but I have a very strong stubborn streak. I would say it borders on rebellious, but the Bible says rebellion is like witchcraft, so I'm sticking with stubborn.

I'm sure I'm not the only one who does this. When advised to do something, I want to do (and sometimes do) the opposite, just because I don't want to get told what to do. Funny that I picked a career in the military. Anyway...

The most recent manifestation of this was over the movie The Blind Side. As soon as it came out, everyone who knew we were foster parents told us we should go see it. Everyone. As time when on and we still hadn't seen it and more and more people told us we should, I pretty much decided I would not ever see it just because everyone said I had to. Then, after Sandra won the Best Actress award at the Oscars and her speech made me cry, "to the moms who take care of the babies and the children no matter where they come from," I thought maybe I would see it after all.

This week it was playing at one of those eat-in theaters for $1, so we went to see it with the family we have visiting. I liked it. It was a good movie. It's a beautiful story. I don't think it deserved an Oscar nomination, nor did Sandra play a role that deserved the win, but I'm still glad she got it. 

Now, please don't get mad at me for this, but I think it's a little odd that people thought we should see it because we are foster parents. I understand it, I guess. They saw this family taking in a kid off the streets and welcoming him into their family and were emotionally moved by it, much like they feel when they hear about us taking in foster kids. But to me, I'd want people who aren't foster parents to see it, because then they'd be inspired to do something similar. And to me it also wasn't a tribute to foster parents, maybe to adoption, working with the homeless, addicts or at risk kids. If anything, it highlights the failure of the foster care system in Memphis at the time to provide a safe and nurturing environment for young Michael Oher. 

I'm interested to see what the Tuohy family does now. Will this be a one-time deal for them or is the change that Michael made in their lives permanent? I'm definitely happy for any story that moves us beyond where we are comfortable and inspires us to do something for other people. That's kindof what I'm trying to do here on this blog.

The best part about going to see The Blind Side? Letting someone else win. My refusal to see it was really worth nothing, but letting the family talk me into it was worth the satisfaction they got from me enjoying it.

How about you? Do you ever do this with movies or other things people over-recommend?


  1. HI-I love your blog. I followed. Please stop by my blog and FOLLOW on my "networked blogs follow" under the ABOUT ME.

    Reyna :)

  2. Just for the record, I haven't seen it. Nor did I recommend that you see it. :) I suppose I'm just not "everyone." :D
    I do want to see it though. Not as badly as I want to see "Date Night" but I love a good movie. From Red Box. For $1. :D
    love you!

  3. If "EVERYONE" loves a movie, I usually won't go see it, unless I already wanted to see it, before all the hype, I usually like movies that "everyone" hates. I liked the blindside though. I feel very much like you do, but especially when it comes to "christian" things like "Passion of the Christ" etc... I think we get it from Mom. :)

  4. I'm not like that, but John really used to be. He's not as much as he was, but sometimes he still "rebels" against the popular.

  5. I am an inconsistent person in this regard so it is hard to honestly evaluate my "stubbornness". Honestly, I am this way with some people and not others. With some people I want to avoid their recommendations like the plague, and others I am like "cool, maybe I should check this out". Not sure why?

  6. Hey Anna, sorry I'm so late commenting here. I'm just reading this post and wanted to tell you how much I enjoyed it. I totally agree with you here! I very much enjoyed the movie The Blind Side. Nobody recommended it to me, although by the time I saw it I knew that many others liked it, too. I agree that it was a good movie but not necessarily Oscar-worthy. (I was pulling for Meryl Streep in Julie and Julia!)

    Anyway, what makes me identify with this post is going back a few years to the release of the movie Facing the Giants. Because I live with infertility/miscarriage, EVERYONE told me that I absolutely must watch this movie. Well, I didn't, and I still haven't. I know part of that is me being stubborn, but I truly couldn't see how watching a fictional story where everyone gets a baby at the end would help someone who is living through infertility. I don't need to watch a movie about it; I'm living it every day! And in reality, sometimes we love God and we have faith, but it's not always in His plan to give everyone a baby (or make the team win the big game, etc).

    You make an excellent point that perhaps it is people who are NOT foster parents who should see the movie. It really doesn't succeed in spreading a message if ONLY those who live a similar story go to see it. Similarly, I think it's also good to branch out and watch movies/read books that show us a different side of life and not only one that reflects our own struggles and experiences.

    Anyway, sorry for the long comment! Thanks for the post! :)


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